The Pete Bates Project
Most women don't miss the danger because it was absent. They miss it because it didn't look like what they were taught to fear.If something feels wrong but you can't name it this is where you start.
"I sent this to my sister. She left two weeks later."
Rebecca, Brisbane
"I've worked in DV for eleven years. This is the clearest public explanation of coercive control I've ever seen."
Kelly, Melbourne
"This content named something I'd been living for three years but couldn't explain to anyone."
P., Sydney
When you know something is wrong but the words keep failing you
How To Say It So They Don't Misread It gives you the exact language to describe what's happening to police, to lawyers, to family in a way that is harder to dismiss, minimise, or file as conflict.
"It gave me language for what my body was doing after he was gone."
S. Brisbane
Not ready to speak live? Send it to Pete.
You write what's been happening. Pete sends back a private voice read what he sees in the pattern, and what looks most important.
No call. No performing ready. No holding yourself together while someone takes notes.
You send it in your own time. You listen privately. You can replay it when your head is clearer.
Built for: coercive control, post-separation abuse, child leverage, court pressure, system misread.
Who We Are
Pete and Belinda Bates built this platform because Pete grew up inside a home where the pattern was never named. He knows what it costs when no one reads it in time. Belinda brings twelve years in corrections. Between them they know what danger looks like before it peaks.
Why This Work Is Personal
I was five years old the first time I understood that the man in our house was dangerous.
Not because he hit her that night. Because of the way he moved before he did.
My mother never got free of it. That pattern the one nobody named is why I do this work.
Every woman who gets the language earlier is a woman my mother never got to be.
What Changed For Them
Shared with permission.
"This content named something I'd been living for three years but couldn't explain to anyone."
P., Sydney
35,000+ followers • 3 million + views • Featured in Courier Mail, Daily Mail, and the Adam Shand podcast
"Every woman who recognises the pattern early
is a woman with a better chance of never becoming the statistic."
